Saturday, November 15, 2008

Sunday, November 9, 2008

I think I'm broken

Another journal entry for y'all. I went out with a man last Saturday night, it went really well. He seemed pretty cool and we had a good time. This man has a number of really great qualities:
1. Genuine, remembers what I say
2. Educated, yep, he has a degree
3. Established, uh huh, a career and a home
4. Healthy, well, he's a trainer and trained high-jumper
5. Respectful, as in he hasn't attempted to grope me

I'm pretty sure he likes me

We've talked EVERY night this week. I'm not exaggerating. Plus, we've "hung out" twice. In addition to that, here are some texts I've received:
"It was just ok then you messaged me it was way better after that!"
"...miss u"
"Maybe if u call me i can ask u out on a date :-)"

I'm pretty sure he likes me

Here's where it becomes pretty evident that I'm broken. I'm not so sure how much I like him. He really is a great guy, but it seems that he likes me a whole lot more than I like him.

Some background:
I've had one "boyfriend." Ever. That's not to say that I haven't been used and abused by plenty of losers in my relationship portfolio. When I say plenty, I mean PLENTY.

The problem:
Here I've stumbled upon a really nice man, who likes me. I feel like, I'm being smothered a bit (really, if I'm not at school, I'm on the phone) by the phone conversations and professing of one-sided emotion. As I think about this brief relationship, I almost wonder if we had a DTR talk that I didn't know about.

I think I could nicely tell him I'd like to go slower, I really do, but I'm not so sure if I want things slower or halted completely.

My sisters, 2 out of 3, have been kind enough to point out my lack of experience in relationships and seem to think that because I'm out-of-practice, I'm thinking too much into this and need to relax, give it some time and see what happens. I've always been of the opinion that if I don't see a future, why waste time.

I guess this is the real problem:
I probably should like this guy, could like this guy, but I keep thinking, isn't there someone who fits my ideal just a little bit more out there for me? No, he's not Mormon, so that's probably his biggest strike, but I feel as though he should still get a chance.

That's where I'm at. Since the vast majority of readers of my blog are married, I have this question for you:
When you initially started dating your spouse, were you content but really wondering if there was someone better out there for you? (I'm not jumping to marriage, but that's where I'd like to be at some point so, yeah...)

The even bigger question:
Have my single years and lack of relationship experience made me set my expectations too high? Am I being too picky?