Oversexed, or is it undersexed?

Small confession to my family and friends to follow. Let me first of all say, that I know I am far from perfect. I've made many a mistake in my lifetime and I'm sure I'm going to make plenty of more. The reason I'm writing this post is to clarify misconceptions any one has about me and my morals. Let me cut to the chase.

For the last 14 months I've come to know the most amazing man. He's considerate and compassionate. He honestly doesn't give much thought to his own needs, and that's probably why everyone who knows him loves him. Long story really, really short: I've been sleeping with him for the last 4 nights.

That's right. I got a genuine Edward Cullen fleece blanket to snuggle up with every night (or any time of day I choose really). I think that the best part of this gift is that it did not come from my family or friends, but was given to me by one of my students (he just shot way up there on the list of favorites, totally kidding). I've had numerous conversations with his mom about the entire Twiligt saga and she knows I'm a fan. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a freak fan, but I have entertained a thought or two about what an amazing relationship that Edward and I could have (if only vampires were real)...

I guess that would take us back to the title. How sad am I, that my lovelife is centered around a fleece blanket?

Eh, oh well. :)

Resolutions re-visited

I think the only New Year's resolution I really remember making is the lose weight one, so I'm a little, sickly, excited to have written the rest of them down last year so that I can really reflect on my failures (okay, I believe that there are some triumphs, too). Lucky y'all for getting to read about it all!

1. Lose weight before summer (I told you it was tradition)
14 pounds totally counts. I'm pretty proud of myself on this one.

2. No credit cards!!!
I haven't used one this month, does that count? I don't plan on picking them up again, I guess this one is To Be Continued...

3. Create and stick to a budget (kinda goes hand in hand with #2)
Check. Well, I have in December and if you can create and stick to a budget in December I think you've got it made.

4. Play! I've spent too much time the last 4 years being comfortable staying home.
Heh heh heh. I've played I suppose... It really does depend on your definition.

5. Get a PG-13 rating on my blog (your post inspired me Lauren, I feel like I have something to strive for), can't be that hard for me.
I think I failed in this. I'm really going to give it another go in 2009. Oh the posts I could post...

6. Delete my MySpace! All I do is stalk people I shouldn't on there anyways.
I totally deleted. Then re-signed up. Then deleted. Now I have Facebook, I believe that is a tiny step in the right direction.

7. Serve more.
I do think I've been better in this area. I actually have a calling that requires it. This will be another one on the 2009 resolutions list.

8. Try to keep up my journal (or blog, or both).
Um. Crap job on the journal, but I did alright on the blog, am I right?

9. Limit my caffeine intake (HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Right!)
No comment.

10. Like myself more.
I do.

That's an 80% folks!

On another note, more posts will likely be on the way as I can only read your SAME posts so many times before I get bored and have to post some of my own. I've got one brewing right now...

The Budgeting Blunder

Get it? Like budgeting "wonder" only not wonder but blunder! I'm good aren't I? Alright, so in an attempt to get ahold of my slippery finances, I'm becoming an anal money recorder/penny pincher/miserly bitty. It's about time!

Really, this is the hardest thing I've done (aside from not putting food in my mouth when I'm bored). I sat with my good friend for two and a half hours while we looked at exactly how much money I spend and how much I bring in. We had to assign money to different categories, "spend it on paper. Hello envelope system!

The worst part is, I can't officially start until Thursday when I get paid, but I'm already ready to break it. But I won't! While I wait, I decorate 10 envelopes to the max 'til I make the withdrawal on Thursday.

Don't be jealous. ;)

On a side note, if anyone was wondering about how I'm doing at stopping food from entering my mouth, I'm about 10% lighter than I was when I started and mmmm, 10 inches tighter (?). That's WW speak for I'm doing alright, but no second 10 pound ribbon just yet.

Did it.

That's all.

I think I'm broken

Another journal entry for y'all. I went out with a man last Saturday night, it went really well. He seemed pretty cool and we had a good time. This man has a number of really great qualities:
1. Genuine, remembers what I say
2. Educated, yep, he has a degree
3. Established, uh huh, a career and a home
4. Healthy, well, he's a trainer and trained high-jumper
5. Respectful, as in he hasn't attempted to grope me

I'm pretty sure he likes me

We've talked EVERY night this week. I'm not exaggerating. Plus, we've "hung out" twice. In addition to that, here are some texts I've received:
"It was just ok then you messaged me it was way better after that!"
"...miss u"
"Maybe if u call me i can ask u out on a date :-)"

I'm pretty sure he likes me

Here's where it becomes pretty evident that I'm broken. I'm not so sure how much I like him. He really is a great guy, but it seems that he likes me a whole lot more than I like him.

Some background:
I've had one "boyfriend." Ever. That's not to say that I haven't been used and abused by plenty of losers in my relationship portfolio. When I say plenty, I mean PLENTY.

The problem:
Here I've stumbled upon a really nice man, who likes me. I feel like, I'm being smothered a bit (really, if I'm not at school, I'm on the phone) by the phone conversations and professing of one-sided emotion. As I think about this brief relationship, I almost wonder if we had a DTR talk that I didn't know about.

I think I could nicely tell him I'd like to go slower, I really do, but I'm not so sure if I want things slower or halted completely.

My sisters, 2 out of 3, have been kind enough to point out my lack of experience in relationships and seem to think that because I'm out-of-practice, I'm thinking too much into this and need to relax, give it some time and see what happens. I've always been of the opinion that if I don't see a future, why waste time.

I guess this is the real problem:
I probably should like this guy, could like this guy, but I keep thinking, isn't there someone who fits my ideal just a little bit more out there for me? No, he's not Mormon, so that's probably his biggest strike, but I feel as though he should still get a chance.

That's where I'm at. Since the vast majority of readers of my blog are married, I have this question for you:
When you initially started dating your spouse, were you content but really wondering if there was someone better out there for you? (I'm not jumping to marriage, but that's where I'd like to be at some point so, yeah...)

The even bigger question:
Have my single years and lack of relationship experience made me set my expectations too high? Am I being too picky?

A picture tag

Because I'm bored and feel the need for comments (you are a bigger person than I Brigitte for turning your comments off for the week):



RULES: You have to post the 4th picture in the 4th folder in your pictures folder. Then give a brief description before you tag a few others.

This is Kelsi and I at Abbey and KJ's apartment partaking in Super Bowl XXXIX (and lots of junk food, you may even see some wing sauce). Stupid Patriots won...

The newly tagged are: (it's so nice being the first in the family tagged, the list is WIDE open) Abbey
Allie
Cara
Marsha

Growing up

First of all, I should get some kind of award for the number of posts I've written in October. This has to be some kind of record! (It is, right?)

Second of all, I'm getting serious here. I've actually meant to sit and write this for many months (now that I said it, I'm not 100% sure I haven't written it...humor me). It's been a neat experience to read my friends' and family's blogs over the last year. Most of the people reading this right now live 600+ miles away from me, so I never get to hear how you are doing and see what you are up to; in addition to that, I don't get to experience the grown ups you have become. I'm sure I'll touch on the female readers some time soon, but this post goes out to the men.

Wow.

Looking at the pictures and reading the stories, I'm sure, don't do you justice. Way back in June, Father's Day to be exact, I remember reading lots of posts going out to the dad's. Most of you had one on your blog, and not to make light of anyone's tribute, I remember Lorraine's standing out. Reading the qualities that she wrote about Jeff being a husband and father floored me (and creeped me out, no offense Jeff). Most of the memories I have of Jeff are of my visits to Roosevelt as a kid and having Easter, or watching Conference, or jumping on the trampoline with the sprinkler under it and going to dinosaur land...it seems so strange to think of him as a dad.

Anyways, that's just one example. I see pictures all the time of my cousins as husbands and fathers and can tell just by looking that you are great at what you do. When did you all grow up into amazing men?

I was talking to a friend of mine at about the quality of men out there to date awhile back, though we talk about it regularly. Most of the men we are acquainted with come in second to a good book. Case-in-point, last weekend I went to a YSA activity (Young Single Adult - a reminder for those of you not single) and had a conversation with a 28 year old man. When I asked him what he did for a living he said he has a lawn mowing business (no mention of a degree), when I asked him how many people work for him he said just himself. I know a lot of 12-14 year olds have lawn mowing businesses. I'm not sure what else to say, I was looking for an escape at that point as a 28 year old professional lawn mower extrordinare did not seem up to snuff. Is that harsh? I realize there is more to a man than his profession, but...

I'm gonna go ahead and tie this single girl soap box up and say "men, I'm impressed" and "congratulations" to the ladies. Nice job rounding up a good one!